I’ve just met a “charming” fellow (read: totally up themselves), who seems to have a rather confused and/or dated view of relationships. Let’s just say I didn’t warm to this chap too much, mainly because everything that escaped their mouth appeared to be for the purpose of self-promotion and/or offending people for the merry hell of it. What a card! So they entered into this piece of rhetoric with both the gusto and wit of Alan Partridge, and described how he thinks he’s “punching above his weight” because his girlfriend is younger than him. Uh, a whole 4 years younger. It’s not exactly J. Howard Marshall and Anna Nicole Smith, is it?

So this was a little weird, and it sounded kinda dumb.  Is that still how we place a value on people these days?  Their age and nothing more?  And the younger the better?

One of my friends sarcastically remarked that Mr. Science Gentleman must really have scored because our age difference is far greater than that.  But that’s the thing, isn’t it?  What the hell is this strange assumption about?  If I was more than a decade older than my boyfriend, would I have grounds to think of myself as particularly lucky?  Perhaps you could call me a cougar or something else to arbitrarily categorise me.

I don’t think so.  For me, it’s more complicated than that. I see my partner as an equal, but often I have dated older people.  But not always, and I don’t see age as either a barrier or benefit.  Some people may do, and based on other people’s relationships, they don’t follow a rule book.  If you want evidence of this, look at the marriage records.  But there are stereotypes about what makes a good partner.  And when we are faced with something that challenges this, ranging from disability, to fetishes, to polyamory, to simple preferences, the weird ideas and jokes all come out.

Humour shouldn’t always be PC, and we should admit to occasionally being amused by the offensive and taboo.  But it does get a bit boring after a while.  Have we really not come up with any new material since 1975?


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